This morning I woke up & noticed how gloomy it is outside. It’s cold and filled with sadness. It has been almost 2 weeks since his passing. I don’t know what to say and I don’t know how to control my feelings. I’m getting better, but when I love someone, I truly love them. My feelings are everywhere, Saddness, pain, not so much shock anymore. It breaks my heart to see our family in such pain. I don’t know how many times I could say it, but our cousin was an incredible incredible incredible man. The sweetest guy, the funny guy, the quiet but not so quiet guy that everybody loved. It’s hard. So incredibly hard. But it supposed to be because he was so unforgettable.
This week our family will lay down to rest an incredible son, grandson, brother, boyfriend, nephew, cousin and friend. I have nothing but good things to say about him.
I remember the first time that I met him, it was basketball season I had just started dating Michael, my husband. I was so excited to meet his basketball friends, his cousins, his aunts, and his uncles. As I pulled into a parking spot I turned and I saw a Nissan Altima. For some reason I really just like those older Nissans. I had one before, so I parked next to it. I got out of my car headed on inside and there I saw them and the cute little red and black sharp shooter uniforms. I met Kevin, and he was sweet and genuine. I remeber him joking with Mikey about Mikey not needing a girlfriend, and how I was going to tie him down. Watch outtt! Ha, I think I told Kevin, Mikey needs me! Haha. Later that night I found out that the Nissan was Kevin’s car, so now I knew who to park by at the next game. Honestky, their basketball games were a full on family event. I learned about so many things and got really heated with a lot of the refs, cheered them on and really felt like I was part of the family.
Fast forward to more family events and parties. So many great memories at Kevin‘s house so many great memories!!! Mikey and I even announced our engagement there. I had just turned 22, I was young and in love and so happy to be part of such an incredible family. From more parties and random hangouts to family photos to birthday parties and milestones. Kevin was there for all of those things including one of the most important days of my life and that was my wedding. I will cherish those memories that we shared forever. I will never forget his love for shoes, hos love for chicken, and pizza, his love for adidas, his 21st birthday, the time he told us he had a girlfriend!!! I would have never imagined what an impact she would make. I really wished that they would’ve gotten married and had the most beautiful beautiful family. She will always be part of our lives, she is such a strong and beautiful woman and I am so happy to call her family as well. I hope one day she will be the godmother of our child, while Kevin is hopefully our childs gaurian angel.
As we get closer to his viewing and his funeral it is hard to remember that we are not saying goodbye, we are simply saying, see you later. But it is so hard to wait so long to see him again. We were all so blessed to know Kevin, also blessed to be able to call him family, blessed to be able to share memories that we will cherish and remember for a lifetime.
If you would like to donate to his go fund me the link will be below or in my previous post if you would like to write a note, memories, condolences, please use link below as well thank you.
We miss you Kevin💙
Use the link below if you’d like to write a note:
In life we sometimes question God. We want answers, we want facts, we want closure. We forget who God is, we forget HOW MUCH he loves us all. We are all his children. ALL OF US. No matter WHAT we do in life, he loves us unconditionally. As much as I asked, as much as I prayed, as much as I questioned the situation I got less frustrated. I spoke with God, this brought me closer to him. He knows what was going to happen before it happened. This may test some peoples faith, I've been down this road 4 times already.
All I can really say is I feel so blessed to have known such an amazing person. God brought Kevin into our lives. Kevin filled it with facts about Adidas, LeBron James, extra stuff about sports that I never knew. His LOVE for always looking FRESH, always with that smile and FRESHER THAN FRESH KICKS. This amazing, smart, loving and wonderful human also suffered. Always did his best to put a smile on someones face.
It really sucks seeing our family go through the loss of Kevin. He was only 22 years old, birthday was right around the corner. He will be 22 forever. It's crazy to think about it, it's hard to process it too. He was there on the best day of my life, my wedding. I was hoping I'd be at his. My husband and I had an idea of maybe in the future after we had children that if Kevin was married, they could be our child's Godparents for his or her baptism. Just like Kevin's parents became our Godparents at our wedding. It's crazy how we can make plans but God has his own. My Nana always used to tell me, don't count your eggs before you buy your chickens. It's true. There are no words I can say to make this situation better, there is nothing I can do to turn back time. What I can do is celebrate his life, remember the great times, remember the not so great times, and pray. Pray for him, pray for his family, pray of his soul. Offer a mass in his name, just pray. It's okay to cry, it's okay to let it out.
Just know this young man was wonderful.
No one is ever ready for the cost of a funeral, especially for a loved one that we expected to be with us till we all had kids, grey hair and dentures. Forever in hearts Kevin.
If you would like to donate via GoFundMe follow the link below. All proceeds of my last inventory in my Tiendita will go directly to help with Kevin's Funeral expenses.
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